Coming to the Tarot Triggered

It’s been a big day. A big week. A big year. I can feel the watery emotional raw-nerve-wrapped part of me bubbling and vibrating away like a kettle that won’t turn off, that hasn’t received the cue to stop, to slow. I can feel the part of me longing for an out, searching inside and outside for help, support, a killswitch. Anxiety creates a lens in which the whole world becomes a series of buttons that may amp it up, or slow it down. I take some deep breaths - a slow-down button is pushed. I get stuck scrolling on something completely inane for 20 minutes - a tension button. I make myself a herbal tea - a button to ground. And then I consider the Tarot… but I can’t predict what kind of button it will be. I am looking for clarity, seeking a direction through, hoping for comfort - will I find it here? Or will the Devil leap out and confirm, Yes! All is as dark as it seems! Will Eight Swords show themselves to remind me how helpless I feel? Or will, cosmos forbid, the Tower arrive, to crush me under the weight of all that isn’t working, all that is wrong in my world, all that is falling apart?

The Tarot is always an ally. But it is not always the gentle touch we hope for when we are hurting. It is a pathway to truth and understanding, and often this can feel like it cuts us deeply. And although the cut is intended to promote healing and connect us with and release the pain that is not meant to be avoided or pushed deeper inside, when we are triggered, overwhelmed, or panicked, the appearance of ‘difficult’ or ‘negative’ cards can feel like too much of a risk. So we save a visit to the tarot for another, more stable day.

This is wise. The self-responsibility and awareness in knowing when not to seek and when to settle in and tend oneself has immeasurable value. However, we can approach the Tarot in a way that is gentle and supportive for a triggered, sensitive heart and body, that is less likely to add to the charge we already carry in our overwhelmed state. And we don’t need to find and learn the ‘silver lining’ of each card, or the positive spin on the more difficult cards to do it. The Tarot can help us diffuse ourselves if we know how to arrive at it’s doorstep, when we can manage that for ourselves in the face of difficult times.

Here are a few things to consider when coming to the Tarot triggered, with spreads and questions for your use and practice.

ONE - COME WITH THE RIGHT QUESTION

I am a big believer that a tarot reading is only as good as the questions you come with. And by question, I am including verbal and clearly languaged questions as much as I am including heart longings that can be identified, yet not named. My point is, you will get a response as worthy as your question, and so a carefully considered question is well worthwhile.

For instance. Coming to the tarot asking “what the fuck??” absolutely has merit on occasion! I have certainly done this more than once. However, I would do my best not to do that when triggered. The heightened state that I am in when at the point of “seriously tarot, WTAF”, does not lend to a receptive, softened place. The answer to WTF will be medicine in line with the charge of the question. Really, what are we asking here? What is the statement that question makes? For myself, it’s basically coming to the tarot and saying “this is some real bullshit, right?” Is that even a question? And more importantly, is there even an answer to that that would I would find satisfactory??

Let me say again that there is nothing wrong with that! I enjoy the potential humour and willingness to self-deprecate it invites. But I am fairly certain that self-deprecating is not what I need in 90% of the situations in which I feel unable to diffuse the tension and pain of a triggered nervous system. It is not in service to tending myself gently. Though it may occasionally serve to feel heard or seen, that questions may best be placed at the feet of a treasured friend rather than the tarot. Just a thought.

So when triggered, ask gentle questions. Soft questions. Kind questions that tenderly invite you into availability for the answer, rather than questions derived from tension. Instead, “how do I fix this?” can become “what does my body need most in this moment?”. “How do I make this stop?” can become “how can I tend myself while being in this discomfort/pain?”. “What is going on?” can become “how can I help myself receive/become aware of/be open to the medicine that is available to me?”. Even as simple a prompt as “I have a gentle enquiry of you”, and opening your draw as a conversation, can be an empowering invitation into compassionate self-care. Kind questions inspire kind answers.

TWO - THE TAROT IS ALWAYS FOR YOU, NEVER AT YOU

I first heard this phrase from tarot teacher Lindsay Mack, and it changed the way I approached the deck when under duress. I realised how often I felt attacked by the Tarot, or how often the Tarot felt it was AT me rather than FOR me. Tarot certainly knows how to give a good finger waggle occasionally when needed, but it is never the judgement I imagine it to be. The judgement is from within, and the Tarot is but the messenger, highlighting the part that jumps to criticism. 

When the Devil shows up, it is not to point the finger. It is not to say “shame on you for your dark parts!”. Not even a little bit! Not now, not ever. If it feels that way, there may be merit to, (perhaps on another, less tense day) exploring what beliefs about ourselves there are that have us pointing at ourselves in disappointment, guilt, or shame. When the Devil shows up it is to bring light to a dark place. Lucifer is, after all, the ‘light bringer’. The pointing, blaming fingers we see are an instalment of our own unconscious device, serving only to keep us small and at the mercy of our hurts, traumas, and wounds.

So when feeling triggered by the tarot, centre back round, lower the pointing fingers of the mind and ask, how is this card showing up FOR me today? How is the Devil an ally FOR me in this moment, rather than a dark spectre I have to confront in battle?

THREE - COME KNOWING THERE IS NO QUICK FIX

Knowing there is rarely, if ever, a supportive quick-fix to anything, can be a powerful boon before coming to the tarot. Surrendering to this has the potential to reduce some of the tension surrounding our triggered state. Checking in with expectations and hopes before we draw a card/s can remove some of the charge, and is especially useful if we don’t pull ‘the card we wanted’. Our expectations dictate a large part of what the tarot has to offering, so take a moment to check in with your expectations before you begin. You may like to go in to the draw under the assumption that whatever comes up will have value and will be medicine - free from definition’s like good or bad, hard or easy - because it does, and it will. Suddenly, Nine swords becomes an offer to really be with yourself in the difficult moment, rather than signifying only that everything is scary and hard.

A good exercise here is to ask yourself, after a few grounding, deep breaths, what am I hoping for? What do I feel I need? Is there a specific type of guidance I am looking for? Are you able to let go of these expectations in order to be of deeper service to yourself, and find the medicine that is truly available to you in this moment? Either way, going into a reading for yourself with this information may be useful.

FOUR - LET THE TAROT SPEAK

Stress is loud. Anxiety is loud. Trauma is loud. They are states in which the body feels under threat, and is vigilantly looking for anything that may hurt us or threaten our survival. Remembering here that to the nervous system, a challenge to an unconscious belief or premise by which we define ourselves, can seem as dangerous as a bear lumbering toward you, and the chemical cascade within is the same. When our perception and receptivity is skewed or overloaded, that inner voice, or connection to self, guides and ally’s, can feel far away and near impossible to make yourself available to. And not only is the message hard to hear, if we do finally get it, it is likely our worry, fear or disbelief will undermine it anyway, convincing us of all the many ways in which it’s not true, too silly, too good for you, not possible. 

When triggered, let the tarot do the talking. Let the keywords speak. Let one word emerge from the depths of the card. Let the colours and figures come to life. Let the tarot show you it’s meaning in all it’s gracious simplicity and depth. And then, let it simmer. Let it rest in you without confirming with more information from your knowing, another card, a book’s suggestions. Allow the tarot to gently offer you it’s medicine in it’s most obvious, assumable form.  Give it time and space to speak, then seek more if needed. What a liberating thing it can be to stop seeking, analysing, deciphering, and just make space for wisdom to land.

Deciphering intuition from other sensations and internal information could have a whole series of articles to itself… but for now, this is a good beginning.

FIVE - WORK WITH YOUR TRIGGERS WHEN FEELING WELL

If the tarot is an ally you often call on, and you know you want to work with it when triggered and overwhelmed, open up a conversation about it with your deck when you are feeling well and stabilised. A deck interview spread can be a clarifying way of understanding the relationship between you, and how you both communicate. It can also help know which deck, if you use more than one, to go to depending on the type of relationship you have. Here is a deck interview spread that I love from Lindsay Mack that you can use to get to know your deck and how they deliver their wisdom.

Let me tell you straight out that I would not use my Thoth deck when triggered! As useful as it can be, I find the medicine and communication style of this deck to be brutal at times and I know that when triggered, this is not supportive or useful for me. In the deck interview that I did for the Thoth deck, for the question “how do you deliver your medicine/information?”, the card was 9 Swords, the Lord of Cruelty. I have since considered myself thoroughly warned, and take self-responsibility when seeking answers from the Thoth tarot, believe me!

On the other hand, my Botanica deck delivers with the grace of the Ace of Cups, and it’s strength is Nine Pentacles. Therefore I am wise to seek supportive medicine where I am most likely to find it, not from where I am most likely to receive tough love! I’ll visit Thoth when I am strong and ready for a hard truth, which when timed well, is incredibly valuable medicine too.

Develop a relationship with your deck when well, so when in challenging times, there is an open door you can step through and be held in with gentleness and understanding. Have a go to spread or two, or pre formulated questions that you can walk with again and again so you can deepen the support that is available to you when triggered.  Some questions you may consider bringing to the Tarot when well are:

• How can I most support myself, generally speaking, while in a triggered state?

• What has the potential to challenge me further while triggered?

• How can I keep coming back to softness in myself in times of turmoil or tension?

• When is coming to the tarot not likely to be supportive?

• Who/which card is a powerful ally for me in turbulent times?

Nine of Swords from the Smith Rider-Waite Tarot

SIX - CHOOSE YOUR OWN MEDICINE (ADVENTURE!)

If there is a card you are hoping for, or one that already feels calming and supportive, then take it out of the deck, and allow it to be your draw. No where does it say you must randomly draw a card from the deck for it to be relevant! In fact, working intentionally with a card of your choice for whatever reason can be a powerful process that can deepen the meaning and medicine of that card for you in a way you won’t ever forget. It is a conscious adventure when we show up in willing resonance to a card, and answer it’s call. If you know what you need is some Empress self-care nurturing, pull out the Empress. If you know what you need is permission to let go or walk away, pull Eight Cups. If you know what you need is hope and guidance, pull the Star. If a card keeps showing up in your mind, your vision, your ear, your heart - pull it. Let the card of your choice empower you, wash over you, offer you it’s medicine. You do not have to rely solely on randomly selecting a card to have what you need. Do not victimise yourself this way. You can absolutely, rightfully so, choose your own medicine. Sometimes the attraction to (or resistance to!) a certain card IS the draw. Trust that.

You may also chose to only draw from the Courts, or only from Pentacles, of only from the Majors. Your imagination is the only limit! I especially love drawing a ‘bright archetype’ and a ‘shadow archetype’ from the 16 Court cards when I feel unclear on a question, or when I am wanting to look at what parts of me need my attention. The bright archetype shows me a clear, conscious ally, already present and at work, accessible and available in the bright light of day. It is a part of me that is strong, active and well versed. The dark archetype shows me something emergent, not yet clear, a part of me still mysterious and unknown that is nevertheless having an influence within me. It may be something that seems challenging or confronting, but also holds great potential and medicine if I can surrender to it. It is also a great exercise before beginning a bigger spread to see what parts of us are particularly activated and alive in the moment.

A LITTLE SPREAD FOR TRIGGERED TIMES

Before beginning, you may like to pull one card from the Court Cards to see what archetype or role within yourself is showing up for you in solidarity and strength at this time. You can do this by shuffling the deck, then drawing cards until the first Court Card appears, or by removing the 16 Courts from the deck and selecting one from the 16.

Card One: An ally showing up for me right now
Card Two: How I can easefully show up for myself right now
Card Three: How I can honour this difficult moment

An overwhelmed or overburdened nervous system can be debilitating, and make us feel powerless to help ourselves. Thankfully, it doesn’t always have to be that way. With the right support in place, we can get better at navigating what our nervous system asks of us when it is struggling, and we can get better at listening.

In conclusion, know that even with all the good intention in the world, there are moments when all that will serve us is waiting out the discomfort, pain, or panic that can arise when triggered. It may be that we need to reach out to others for support, and hopefully that can happen without hesitance. Know that no matter what card is pulled or what you derive from it, you are doing your best to be of service to yourself. As the tarot is doing its best to be of service to you. Know that you can always come back another time, another moment, another day, for another conversation. For being with what is, tarot or no, is the most potent, and kindest medicine you could possibly be willing to receive from yourself, triggered or not.

Rebecca is a Naturopath, Kinesiologist & Mentor, and has been practicing and working with the Tarot for over 20 years. Upon finding her Oma’s Tarot deck when she was 13, she knew that she had found a lifelong ally, and from there a deep love of Witchcraft grew.

Rebecca reads the Tarot with genuine warmth and honesty, journeying with the Seeker to find clarity and truth. Her approach brings a Rewilded perspective to the Tarot, making it approachable, relatable, and as rooted in the mundane as it is woven in the otherworldly.

This article is the property of Rebecca van Horssen. It is intended for personal and individual use only, and is not to be used for profit, or group education purposes. For more information or to gain permission to use any part of this written content please contact Rebecca directly. All photographs used are either personal or from the public domain.